I guess it's time

I guess it's time to make an official internet announcement that we'll be heading to Utah for the next 2 years for Nathan to get his MBA.  We thought we were going to be here in our current situation for a little bit longer, but in a crazy whirlwind of events, we'll instead be heading back to Provo.  It has been an emotional roller coaster, and we have to remember the nights when we felt a lot of peace and comfort and assurance that this is the right decision, because right now, my stomach is in knots.  Yesterday I talked with Brittany Erickson (who just had her twin boys--both healthy!!), and was able to really tell her how I was feeling, knowing that she'd understand because she just went through something very similar (a quick departure from our beloved Menlo Park--not the having twins; that's something I'll never be able to help her out w/).  After talking to her, I felt a lot better, so I'm hoping that a blog post with my feelings will be therapeutic as well, or just make me cry, which is also therapeutic a lot of time.  Either way, I'm hoping this will be helpful.

Let's see, where do we start.  First of all, let me say that I love my husband and I'm so grateful that he takes the responsibility to provide for our family and doesn't shirk from that.  He takes it very seriously and wants to succeed. I would move almost anywhere (I've ruled out Detroit and some other sketchy places) to support his career because as a wife I think it's imperative to support your husband in his job. Getting an MBA right now seems like the right thing.  We thought that his current position could be extremely long term, but after doing a bit of the math and his feelings on where the industry is going, he thought that though his job isn't in jeopardy or anything like that, he could go back to school and reposition himself for a better future career.  I think it's great.  I'm completely supportive of the decision, and overall it's going to be a great experience. And hey, we've almost been here 2 years and that's just too long for us to stay in one spot, right?  Gotta keep life interesting.

So, when people ask, "Well, how are YOU feeling about it?"  I respond with mixed emotions because I do think it's a right and good decision and the outcome will be great, but then come all of the selfish reasons:

We have the best friends here.  Just thinking about them and all of the memories that we have with them fills my heart. When we moved here, I had a really hard time at first because I didn't have a tight circle of friends, but now, 5 years later, I feel like I have the best friends in the world.  Most people who live here don't have family around, so we rely on each other.  When I need help, it's my friends who are offering.  When Levi was born and after family help had left, it was my best friends who came and took Claire to make the transition easier.  When Nathan hurt his arm and couldn't hold children, it was my friends who brought dinner and took care of us.  We don't have family to go to on Sundays for dinner, but instead we have friends over, or go to bbq's with all of them.  I look up to all of them and love them so much and will cherish this time that we've had.  The weekly park days, the museum visits, beach days, etc.  have been great.  And that's the other thing--Claire (and now Levi) have such amazing friends here too.  They don't really know it, but there are so many families who have kids exactly their ages who we've been able to do everything with, and it's literally been an answer to prayers.  So, that's the hardest thing about this.  Of course I know (in my logical thinking) that we have great friends in Utah waiting for us :), and that we'll make new friends, and that we'll be surrounded by lots of other families who have kids, but some friends are gold, right?

I love Menlo.  It is beautiful here.  I love the weather.  I love that we're surrounded by innovation and intelligence.  I love that we're in the heart of technology, but there are also farms within our ward boundaries.  I love that we're close to San Francisco, but that we live in probably the most beautiful suburb in the nation.  I love all of the museums, libraries, etc which are provided and which provide so much entertainment. I love that we're still close to family, but still far enough away to have our own life.  I love that I'm still finding new fun places to go, even though we've been here for 5 years.  I love Coleman Avenue (our street), and all of the memories that we had when we were first here (dinners, games, swimming with the Mayfields and Ericksons), and the memories that we're making now (walking to the parks with the Robertsons, and dessert nights with the Hiltons).  I love the picturesque neighborhood adjacent to our street, which I will only dream about living in.  I love the emphasis put on education.  I love that the wealthiest person could be walking down the street and you'd have no idea because he'd be in jeans and a northface jacket.  It's just a wonderful place to live.  So I guess I should count my blessings that we had the opportunity to live here.  Inside, I'd love to come back here, but there are so many factors in that post-mba decision, and realistically it probably won't happen. Thankfully, I have lots of pictures, and I'm sure that i'll refer to them often, especially in those cold dark months in Provo.

Which brings me to Utah. Let's just say I never thought we'd be going back.  But, the great things are that 1) we have some of our best friends there which will be so fun 2) I'm really excited to live close to both my brother and sister, especially since we've never lived by family 3) Utah is a great place for a family, and I'm excited to have a completely different experience there now with kids.  I know that there's tons to do, and one of my favorite things in life is finding new things to do.  And, we're going to find them! 4) I was blessed to find an old friend who has a little boy Claire's age, and we're planning on doing a co-op preschool together.

So, we're focusing on the positive.  We'll be in SoCal for July and half of August, which will be awesome, and having my mom here to help us move will help ease the transition.  But there will still be lots of tears when we drive away from 94025.  It's been fantastic.